With summer on the horizon, many of us start thinking about vacations. If we want to include other generations — adult children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews — in our plans, we need to confirm arrangements soon. Multi- or intergenerational vacations require a considerable effort in conceiving, coordinating, executing. I’m not talking about adult children visiting us at home, though we often behave as on holiday when they do. I’m referring to destination vacations.
According to the Chicago Tribune, 32% of American grandparents go on vacations with their grandchildren. While boomers often foot the bill, that doesn’t mean they should dictate the terms. Some of the joy lies in anticipation. Through consultation, excitement can mount for all participants before they even step into a plane, train or automobile.
VACATION TIPS
- Location: choose a place that offers activities to satisfy everyone in the group. Look for pursuits that enable us to engage with the younger generations, not simply observe them from the sidelines. In the summer think swimming pools, beaches and nature trails, for instance.
- Accommodation: we opt for a three-bedroom unit, with a full kitchen, to house four adults and two, next time three, young children. I liked our rustic cottage at the White Pine Camp in the Adirondacks — with no TV, Internet or telephone.
- Dining: food is important, but it may not be fine dining. Menus should be simple, readily prepared, and appeal to the children’s appetites as well as our own.
- Privacy: allow for private moments and respect the personal space of others. After all, quality time doesn’t have to equal togetherness 24-7.
- Attitude: traveling can be stressful, especially with little ones. Leave our stress at home to bring our best selves to the trip. Maintain a sense of humour, remembering that misadventures may eventually turn into family lore. And, as the key organizer, don’t fret about everyone’s enjoyment. Each adult must accept responsibility to get the most from the holiday.
GRANDPARENTS UNIVERSITY
From our friends Judy and Al: “Each summer Michigan State University (as one of several U.S. universities) offers a three-day program called Grandparents University for grandparents and their grandchildren ages 8 to 12. We attended two years ago with our grandsons, Max and Lev.
Attendees live in a dorm and eat at the residence hall cafeteria. We took classes on cookie decorating, smashing atoms, cattle farming and making biofuels, plodded through cow pastures, extracted DNA from strawberries, broke rocks, bowled, toured a cyclotron, and hiked around campus on a scavenger hunt using GPS coordinates as our “map.” We played games and attended a pep rally. Each experience led to conversations, reflections, and giggles. We marvelled at our grandsons’ ability to focus on and learn from the classes.
We learned along with them, often thanks to their expertise in technology. They helped us understand how to use GPS signals to find things and showed me how to use a selfie stick with my cell phone.
Since Al attended MSU as an undergrad and I earned my MA there, we shared memories of our college years with Max and Lev, telling them about life “in the good old days.” For example, there was an empty telephone booth in the dorm lobby. We explained what it was and how it had been used. The boys were amazed we didn’t have cell phones and had to have coins to place a call. And they couldn’t believe we had no computers or internet to help us with our school work.
The camp provided an excellent opportunity to learn, play, and create together. It was a wonderful bonding experience that built lasting memories!”
For a somewhat similar experience Road Scholar markets adventures packed with field outings designed to involve two generations.
BENEFITS
- AARP travel surveys show that families take intergenerational vacations to get everyone together (83%), help build special memories (69 percent), connect grandparents with grandkids (50 percent), enjoy quality time (36 percent) and pass time with younger generations (29 percent).
- We can relate in a relaxed manner, without the pressure of deadlines or work/school commitments.
- Vacationing together improves our long-term relationships. An added bonus: we’ve become better acquainted with our son-in-law.
- Maintaining pleasurable ties with younger generations promotes a sense of well-being.
We have formed enduring stories from two multigenerational vacations (three for Glen with a week-long camping trip) and look forward to forging new ones in the future. Please add your views on multi- or intergenerational vacations in the comments below. •
Judith A Frank says
We really like the research you provided as background for and in support of thepost. Also loved the family photo. Thanks for including our reflections on Grandparents University.
Judy and Al
Pam McPhail says
In addition to Grandparents University, you’ve enjoyed several multigenerational trips, including one last June to mark a milestone. They are fun!
Nina McPhail says
Our trip to Paris and London last year with our 11 year old Grandson, couldn’t have been better. Not only did he remember how to get back to our hotel using the Metro in Paris and the Tube in London much better than I did, he will always remember the historical sites and maybe more importantly, the people who live there. We would certainly go on more Inter-generational trips. I also liked the sound of Grandparents University.
Pam McPhail says
I wonder about your next destination given the complete success of the trip to France and England? Maybe don’t wait for a wedding invitation before making plans for another multigenerational vacation. You had such a good and memorable time.
Glen Wickens says
Seize the day, grandparents! Grandchildren will soon be teenagers and less inclined to go on a destination holiday with you. And, as Pam often reminds me, stay in shape. The last time I went bike riding with Henry he flew past me as if I were not moving. So many great memories from our destination holidays and, perhaps most importantly, the children remember too, often, in our case, asking to go back to Gate Cottage in the Adirondacks or the condo we rented near the Elk river in Fernie, B.C. Lots of time on these kinds of holidays for me to do an activity on my own. I still remember fly fishing on the Elk and when the cutthroat trout weren’t biting (i.e. most of the time) just admiring the beautiful scenery of the surrounding Rocky Mountains. Only one problem with destination holidays that feature outdoor activities. You usually have to book well ahead and roll the dice on the weather. We got lucky twice.
Pam McPhail says
You’re right: weather, weather, weather. Almost as important as location, location, location.
Roy McPhail says
Marika reminded me that we have been doing Starbelly Jam (https://starbellyjam.org/) since Ryze was a toddler. Lots of great memories.
Pam McPhail says
Looks like years of good fun!
colleen says
George and I came across a family vacation in Maui parents, grandparent and kid. There was a cutie having a meltdown and screaming NO. George convinced the little girl that his bearded self was Santa. She took his finger and walked down many stairs to the street. We went the other way. The little girl kept yelling bye Santa until George waved goodbye to her. The parents probably used the Santa sighting to keep the sweetie calm for the rest of the trip. Just showing that sometimes strangers can provide some family help.
Pam McPhail says
Seems like George provided a clever distraction to an upset child, much to the relief of her parents. Well done, George!