Half the fun of travelling for me lies in the planning, but travelling solo means we cannot share the anticipation of adventure with anyone. The trip’s in our own head, from beginning to end. On the other hand, we can choose the destination and activities with no regard for another’s wishes.
In retirement we may revert to pleasures from our younger years that we suspended for lack of time or circumstances. In my twenties I travelled alone for business and pleasure. (The travel industry coined a word to describe business and leisure travel, bleisure, similar to glamping and staycation.) For instance, I remember touring Ireland by train and, while dining at a hotel in Galway, being told to evacuate because of a bomb threat. Sitting poolside at a resort in Antigua, I wrote an essay on “Dief” for a course at U of T. I discovered the gently sloping South Saskatchewan River valley in Medicine Hat, driving about Alberta on my tribute to autumn. It’s not strange then, as Glen first thought, that I booked a solo sojourn this spring.
In fact I joined a trend: an online survey revealed 65% of American women polled vacationed without their partners, with the majority of them choosing to travel solo so they’re free to make decisions and be themselves.
My recent venture extended a theme of nostalgia, which began in 2016 when I and two brothers visited our parents’ past in Winnipeg and Bienfait. In 2017 I checked out our house in Calgary where I was born. The focus of this recent trip was Edmonton, my home from age six, but first I flew to Saskatoon to tour a spectacular new art gallery in a Prairie city I visited for bleisure in the ’70s.
To maximize sightseeing opportunities on my four-day trip, I formulated a full itinerary at home, identifying the attractions to see and the restaurants to dine at. I even charted the routes to walk, thanks to Mapquest. Weather affects my satisfaction in travelling now. Because I was walking through my past, I hoped rain would not dampen my fun. The Prairie cities obliged.
CONSIDERATIONS
- On a friend’s advice, I pack a lengthy, mystery novel to keep me engrossed during flights and nights.
- Travel well. Booking my two-day train trip to Winnipeg, I splurged on a cabin and then relished privately the mesmerizing effect of motion and passing scenery. This time using Aeroplan points, I booked a connecting flight to Edmonton from Saskatoon. Instead of flying to YEG in 1hr 23m, I spent 3hr 35m with a stop in YYC. I should have flown direct!
- Stretch the budget to stay in decent hotels. The grand railway hotels, that figured prominently in the development of the West, provide central locations, comfort and safety, along with a bit of history. Moreover, as it may well be a first and last solo trip to that particular destination, do it right.
- Wear practical shoes. On my feet for eight hours in Saskatoon, I walked over 20,000 steps but also stood to view displays at the Ukrainian Museum of Canada, the Diefenbaker Canada Centre (where I met a contrasting perspective to mine of decades earlier), and the Remai Modern Art Gallery. I broke one of Glen’s travel rules — “a museum a day” — that admittedly led to my weary brain and feet at day’s end.
- I initially reserved a car in Edmonton, then realized the combination of an airport shuttle and public transit would offer stress-free, inexpensive and environmentally friendly transport.
- While it may seem indecorous for couples or families to use their devices at restaurants, it’s okay for solo diners. My iPad and a newspaper accompany me to meals, or I work on a crossword puzzle.
Travelling alone at this stage represents another example of becoming my Mother’s daughter — with difference. Mom liked her many solo experiences, particularly the cruises, but she was highly sociable. She’d often close the ship’s bar after dancing the night away. She made plenty of acquaintances, whereas I prefer not to meet people — being solitary, not antisocial. On my own I am observant and serene.
These years I am for the most part invisible, moving about freely with a carefree mind, encountering no unwelcome advances. No untoward looks. Except when I spoke to a man in the elevator of the Chateau Lacombe. Our superficial exchange resulted in a dinner invitation to the revolving restaurant on the 24th floor. In the ’80s Glen and I went on dates to La Ronde, ordering Baked Alaska and Spanish coffees, so I intended to go there. But when the gentleman proposed a social encounter, I decided to dine elsewhere.
Like most travellers, I take lots of photos, some as content for my diversion of Instagram. I also record interesting facts, such as the first major immigration to Canada from Ukraine occurred between 1891 and 1914. Most of the 170,000 rural poor settled in the Prairie provinces. Today Canada has the third-largest Ukrainian population in the world (behind Ukraine and Russia).
Travelling solo — to experience a change of scene and stimulate our senses — reminds us how much we value our rituals (and our spouse) at home. •
P.S. To fulfil my ambition to visit Canada’s ten provinces, I will travel to St. John’s NL. I may not make it to our three territories.
Grant McPhail says
Although not female, I went around the world by myself in 1976. Wouldn’t have done it any other way.
Pam McPhail says
Solo male travellers were in the majority in the ’70s. Now women outnumber men by far. Apparently men don’t much enjoy being alone and they lose interest. You may not circle back to your preference of the past, in part because you’ve got a wonderful travelling companion in Dale.
Glen Wickens says
Hmm, I may have to write a companion piece: Home Alone or Just the Dog and Me.
Pam McPhail says
Go for Home Alone. Then, like the movies, you can write a series, as you’re bound to be Home Alone 2 and…
Linda says
I agree Glen, there will definitely be more than one, two or even three postings in this series.
Tim McPhail says
You do enjoy your travelling Pam !! However, it’s decidedly different today from your earlier days. You mention having your iPad with you. The internet has revolutionized travel the last couple of decades. From the planning stage to the keeping contact with loved ones, travellers have been liberated. I’m sure we will see more adventurous spirits like Dorothy and you that will be travelling solo.
Pam McPhail says
I don’t remember to give Glen my travel details, e.g., phone number of the hotels. Nor do I carry emergency contact information. Carelessness at play. However, I send a nightly email to assure him all is well.
Tanya Loretto says
I appreciate you sharing on this topic Pam- I too love to travel solo. I feel deep peace and joy as I travel where I want, doing what I love to do and all at the pace I desire.
Pam McPhail says
Well said, Tanya. “Pace” is an especially key word, and setting our own is liberating.
Sonya Bardati says
It is so nice to read your “sunset years” and the comments from friends and family, it touches on my experience, and Pam – go for it-, it’s the new world and Tim is right in saying it is so different today with your connection with your significant other through internet. I was off solo in May and Ken is off solo at the end of August, we will be only a key touch away.
Pam McPhail says
Thanks for adding your comments, Sonya. Where did you venture on your solo trip?
Linda W says
I love reading your articles Pam. I too am a solitary person, but I have to admit I prefer to travel with someone else. My research includes many of the same things as yourself, but I might spend a bit more time finding out when and where local markets are.
I have to admit that I am always happy to get home to our beautiful city.
Pam McPhail says
You tend to take trips longer in duration than my solo ones, such as your adventure in India, so that’s one reason you prefer to travel with someone else. I’ve yet to determine how long to be on my own before feeling lonely or making Glen feel bad.
Ian Wallace says
An excellent post, Pam. As usual you are enlightening your many readers. Travelling alone does have its advantages and guarantees that one will never be slowed down by a group or by a travel companion with different ideas about where/when to go each day. One of these days I think I might very well pick a place or two my dear spouse has no interest in and buy myself a RT ticket. Thanks for the inspiration.
Pam McPhail says
While my spouse eschews going to new destinations, Ian, yours is still willing and able. I am not confident you could determine a place of no interest to your intrepid traveling companion.