• HOME
  • INTRODUCTION
  • FUN FACTS FRIDAYS
  • TV THURSDAYS
  • GOOD BOOKS
  • C O N T A C T

Sunset Years

Making the later years the best ever!

WISDOM WASTED?

October 1, 2017

If youth is wasted on the young — an observation widely attributed to George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) — then wisdom is wasted on the old.

During our lives we experience innumerable events, good and bad, listen to or witness the trials and achievements of family and friends, read hundreds (thousands) of books and newspapers, watch countless movies and TV shows. If we pay attention, if we analyze the content of these many influences over the years, if we learn from them, then we gain wisdom. But who will benefit from our wisdom? Very few people will take it, least of all those closest to us.

I’m not talking about taking our children, grandchildren, nieces or nephews to museums, galleries, historic sites. Such outings enrich their lives, for sure, representing time well spent. But how often do we wish we’d understood then what we understand now. And if only we could pass on the insights we’ve realized over time. It’s especially difficult to communicate through the generations — because youth wants to experience the world on its own terms. Naturally so.

Following are a few insights, first related to me as adages, that I wish I’d followed then…

LESSONS LEARNED
  • If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Perhaps it takes time to appreciate the true meaning of the word ‘nice’. Nice can connote weak, boring, predictable. After all, nice guys — and girls — finish last. Wrong. The dictionary defines the word as “kind; pleasing; agreeable.” Given the denotation, who shouldn’t aspire to be nice and to say nice things? 
  • “Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit…” stated Oscar Wilde (1854-1900). While wit is a keen perception, aptly expressed to awaken amusement, sarcasm is a cutting remark that generally gets laughs at someone’s expense. Instead of being funny, it can be hurtful or embarrassing. 
  • “To err is human; to forgive, divine,” wrote Alexander Pope (1688-1744). Forgiveness is one of the best traits a person can possess. How much time do or did we waste on petty disagreements? Grudges weigh us down and cause us stress. If something isn’t a life or death situation, how meaningful is it? Practice forgiveness instead. Forgiveness is not about pride or ego; it’s something we do to help us find peace. For a powerful model, think of Nelson Mandela who emerged from 27 years in prison and said: “As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.”
  • Remember the proverb “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink”? We can hope to be one of a number of positive influences, maybe even an important one, in the lives of those near or dear to us. We can offer opportunities to people. And we can show by example. But we cannot control or dictate the behaviour of others, young or old.

By this stage, we’ve identified our principles. And we now choose our friends and acquaintances based on them. Sure we can disagree, gently, on politics, but we need some shared values to create a community of friends.

If our wisdom’s wasted on others, let’s at least benefit personally from it by striving to become better versions of ourselves. •

P.S. In the profound words of William Wordsworth (1770-1850): “Wisdom is oftentimes nearer when we stoop than when we soar.”

wisdom and sweetness
I now aim to be nice and sweet!

 

 

Share this:

  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window) LinkedIn

Related

15 Comments
Filed Under: Happiness, Well-being Tagged: tips

Comments

  1. Linda W says

    October 1, 2017 at 3:52 pm

    I certainly enjoy your posts Pam. They certainly make you think about life. Thanks

    Reply
    • Pam McPhail says

      October 1, 2017 at 8:58 pm

      Thank you, Linda.

      Reply
  2. Marie McLean says

    October 1, 2017 at 4:12 pm

    Actually, Pam, if you look at your post, wisdom is not wasted on the old. We become better persons by paying attention to what we’ve learned, so we are more pleasant to be around. So even though they may not realize it and are loathe to admit it, young people benefit from our wisdom. (That myth about a “grumpy old man or woman” having the right to be cantankerous because of their age is not true. Most people avoid an unpleasant person.)

    Reply
    • Pam McPhail says

      October 1, 2017 at 9:00 pm

      Yeah. Let’s hope we do in fact become better persons.

      Reply
  3. Grant McPhail says

    October 1, 2017 at 7:08 pm

    Good points here. Knowledge can be passed on but wisdom must be earned. I like your entreaty to apply what wisdom we may have acquired. I guess that’s maturity.

    Reply
    • Pam McPhail says

      October 1, 2017 at 9:03 pm

      Nicely said, Grant.

      Reply
  4. Brandon says

    October 10, 2017 at 2:08 pm

    Interesting! 🙂

    Reply
  5. Glen Wickens says

    October 15, 2017 at 6:55 am

    Is it possible to influence people who are older? Your premise seems to be that we can change as we get older and even change for the better.

    Reply
    • Pam McPhail says

      October 29, 2017 at 11:54 am

      A person at any age has to want to change, presumably for the better. Then she or he will follow or seek positive influences, or draw upon the wisdom acquired over the years. Of course we cannot control or dictate change in anyone — other than ourselves.

      Reply
  6. Grant says

    October 29, 2017 at 2:35 pm

    I have learned a lot from younger co-workers and especially from my children. They can have knowledge and wisdom in diverse areas at any age.

    Reply
    • Pam McPhail says

      October 29, 2017 at 5:42 pm

      With an open mind, and an open heart, we can learn from anyone, anytime.

      Reply
  7. Tony Brydon says

    November 23, 2021 at 10:44 pm

    The premise behind imparting wisdom on either the young or the old needs to be understood. Just because someone is wise doesn’t mean their intentions are good. Beware of wise old souls who only look to enrich themselves by promoting wise traits that lead to their own benefit. The conversation is uplifting, until you consider the darker side of human nature. Buyer beware!

    Reply
  8. Vincent Ciolino says

    October 14, 2023 at 4:29 pm

    What a great read. Thank you for this

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Welcome to Pam McPhail's blog about the sunset years, a metaphor for the stage in life when we're no longer fully occupied in the workplace or at home. We’re free to set our own agendas. Together let's explore how to make these years our best ever.
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn

Recent Posts

  • WHAT’S A STORY WORTH?
  • D-DAY FACTS
  • TV THURSDAYS: RIPLEY
  • WORLD BOOK DAY 2024
  • THE RIGHT TIME
  • DECIDING ON DECISIONS
  • TAKE IT TO HEART

Recent Comments

  • Daily Riddles on FUN FACTS FRIDAYS: RIDDLES, THE SEQUEL
  • Linda McAmmond on LOSING A SIBLING
  • Pam McPhail on WHAT’S A STORY WORTH?
  • Pam McPhail on WHAT’S A STORY WORTH?

Archives

Categories

Copyright © 2025

Copyright © 2025 · Hawaii Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

Manage Cookie Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}